Egad!

I was tooling around eBay the other day in my endless hunt for the Holy Grail of handmade purses, and I came across this curious offering. Admittedly, it's not my type, but I like it marginally better than any of the cloying Vera Bradley offerings. What is truly alarming about this purse, though, is the way the maker is attempting to market it. S/he has it listed as (and I quote) "RETRO, PUNK, EMO FLOWER POWER PRINT FABRIC PURSE, BAG." Wh-HA? While I'm no music scholar, I'm pretty sure that "punk" and "emo" have their own distinct sounds and, I am guessing, styles. And, to the best of my knowledge, neither of them involves "flower power." Moreover, I feel confident in observing that "retro" is a gesture to an earlier style of either fashion or music, but, again, I'm not sure that this crafter was going for either "retro" punk or "retro" emo (whatever that would be at this point). I have...a headache.

With appologies to MC Lars, perhaps it would behoove us to have some official benchmarks for fashion associated with music. Here are my ideas for fabric (and flowers!) that can help us distinguish between musical styles:

Punk: Tartan plaid (100% cotton); black bog rush

Reggae: Unbleached muslin; marajuana leaf

Ska: Gaberdine; pink carnation

Hair band: Black or silver pleather; rose (w/thorn)

Metal: Acid-wash cotton (for jeans/jackets); flower? What flower?

Old School Rap: Kelly green satin (quilted); dandelion

Boy Band: Rayon (a la New Kids); pansy

Grunge: Flannel; piper's harebell

Gangsta Rap: Jersey cotton; an jewelry-type flower made entirely of "bling"

Emo: too-tight cotton-poly (brightly colored); daisies

Whatever Tool is: hell if I know